ON THE EXPERIENCE OF RYAN FITZGERALD
If you read the Tags (below) and view the video again: I'm Here For EVERYONE! Give Me A Call! 7742531962 . . .
What is your PERCEPTION?
What is your EXPERIENCE?
What Ryan Fitzgerald says in this latest video:
" . . . also, I'm not gay. I don't know why people keep saying this. There's a lot of people trying to say that, but it's not true. I'm doing this to help people and for no other reason other than that."
A few days ago, "Youand: the art of mutual understanding" awarded Ryan the first ever, "Youand Award." (Ryan has yet to claim it.) I said, "Just spoke with Ryan. He's not only legit, but coming from a very good place."
Since Youand has everything to do with mutual understanding for its own sake, I thought Ryan's simple gesture to lend an ear to another, with no agenda, was a great example of Youand in action. The huge outpouring of response to Ryan's offer was both inspiration and affirmation of the great need today for ways to improve the quality of our human relations.
With the mainstream media shinning such bright light on Ryan's beautiful gesture I missed a few details of his original offer. Or, was it that my own need for meaningful human connection influenced my perception? Over the next few days after his original simple 49 second video, two other video posts of his have followed.
In each of Ryan's next two videos he makes special mention about his displeasure that people think he is "gay." And he says that he can not understand why anyone might think so. Or, why they might think that his intentions are not without agenda.
A Youand approach recognizes that one's PERCEPTION in not "reality." And, that each person has their own EXPERIENCE of their own PERCEPTION, which also is not "reality." That for example, two people can observe the same event, each have their own PERCEPTION of that same thing, and each have their own unique EXPERIENCE of that same event.
This outlook is not unique to Youand. The Roman Stoic philosopher, Epictetus said: "Work, therefore to be able to say to every harsh appearance, "You are but an appearance, and not absolutely the thing you appear to be." And then examine it by those rules which you have, and first, and chiefly, by this: whether it concerns the things which are in our own control, or those which are not; and, if it concerns anything not in our control, be prepared to say that it is nothing to you."
Ahead, you'll see screen shots of Ryan's first two YouTube video posts with detail views of the the bio and tags sections for each post.
If you read the Tags and view the video again: I'm Here For EVERYONE! Give Me A Call! 7742531962 . . .
What is your PERCEPTION?
What is your EXPERIENCE (thoughts, judgments, conclusions, opinions, labels, feelings, values that come to mind)?
-------------------------------
"The final frontier may be human relationships, one person to another." -- Buzz Aldrin, Astronaut
What is your PERCEPTION?
What is your EXPERIENCE?
---
PREFACE: The intention behind this post is solely to contemplate on the phenomenon of human PERCEPTION, how we EXPERIENCE our PERCEPTIONS; and, how the interplay of individuals' PERCEPTION(s) and EXPERIENCE(s) can lead to misunderstanding.What Ryan Fitzgerald says in this latest video:
" . . . also, I'm not gay. I don't know why people keep saying this. There's a lot of people trying to say that, but it's not true. I'm doing this to help people and for no other reason other than that."
A few days ago, "Youand: the art of mutual understanding" awarded Ryan the first ever, "Youand Award." (Ryan has yet to claim it.) I said, "Just spoke with Ryan. He's not only legit, but coming from a very good place."
Since Youand has everything to do with mutual understanding for its own sake, I thought Ryan's simple gesture to lend an ear to another, with no agenda, was a great example of Youand in action. The huge outpouring of response to Ryan's offer was both inspiration and affirmation of the great need today for ways to improve the quality of our human relations.
With the mainstream media shinning such bright light on Ryan's beautiful gesture I missed a few details of his original offer. Or, was it that my own need for meaningful human connection influenced my perception? Over the next few days after his original simple 49 second video, two other video posts of his have followed.
In each of Ryan's next two videos he makes special mention about his displeasure that people think he is "gay." And he says that he can not understand why anyone might think so. Or, why they might think that his intentions are not without agenda.
A Youand approach recognizes that one's PERCEPTION in not "reality." And, that each person has their own EXPERIENCE of their own PERCEPTION, which also is not "reality." That for example, two people can observe the same event, each have their own PERCEPTION of that same thing, and each have their own unique EXPERIENCE of that same event.
This outlook is not unique to Youand. The Roman Stoic philosopher, Epictetus said: "Work, therefore to be able to say to every harsh appearance, "You are but an appearance, and not absolutely the thing you appear to be." And then examine it by those rules which you have, and first, and chiefly, by this: whether it concerns the things which are in our own control, or those which are not; and, if it concerns anything not in our control, be prepared to say that it is nothing to you."
Ahead, you'll see screen shots of Ryan's first two YouTube video posts with detail views of the the bio and tags sections for each post.
-- first post --
click on image to enlarge
-- second post --
If you read the Tags and view the video again: I'm Here For EVERYONE! Give Me A Call! 7742531962 . . .
What is your PERCEPTION?
What is your EXPERIENCE (thoughts, judgments, conclusions, opinions, labels, feelings, values that come to mind)?
-------------------------------
"The final frontier may be human relationships, one person to another." -- Buzz Aldrin, Astronaut
posted by José Angel Santana, Ph.D. at 2:07 PM
2 Comments:
Dear Jose,
My perception is that philosophy & young men's fancies are ribbons in a great lace of realities weaving & unweaving a great basket of infinity complexity, filling & emptying in a wondrous banquet of folly & wisdom.
My experience of young Ryan is one of sadness. He is twisting in the winds of this culture's spasmic identity crisis. How we applaud Mother Teresa-like efforts (individual) even as we destroy or decry instituional efforts that would make such individual efforts moot even as they help more people. As an individual we get to help who we want to help, as part of a greater community we help who we might individually demonize (gays in this culture are still widely held as contemptible). The shadows dance with the light. How sad the Virginia Tech incident yet who wears colors for the daily atrocities committed by the U.S. policy in Iraq & other parts of the world?
My perception & experience of Ryan is that he is a nearly perfect exemplar of America's good guy complex. How our good intentions highlight our ignorance of the other's needs. One-sided good intentions lead us to the aphorism that no good deed goes unpunished.
Truth is a three-sided coin.
Love,
Ric
Dear Ric,
Thank you for your thoughtful and insightful words. Like Adolf Guggenbuhl-Craig, you always provide the "other side" of what’s on the surface. You remind me of how important, it is, our field of Cultural Mythology.
There is another young man on YouTube who has gotten over a million views of his video asking others to call him. He did so before Ryan Fitzgerald, yet it is Ryan who captures the nations attention for an instant. Perhaps it is just as you say, the sadness that is so evident in his short video and on his subsequent television appearances.
My conversation with Ryan was short, I congratulated him for his effort to "listen" to others. I commended him for setting an example to others of how much need we all have to be heard. I also experienced him as an affirmation of something my intuition has been saying to me since the inception of Youand, which only now I realize has much to do with the points you raise - a collective "social isolation" that we, at least in the United States, feel even without realizing it as such.
About this particular post of mine and on a somewhat more mundane level, I also found it startling that Ryan could not see how putting "hott" "sexy" "boy" would not lead others to EXPERIENCE that his request was for something other than just to "lend an ear."
And, as always thank you for your brilliant “truth.”
Love,
José Angel Santana
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